Rachel’s Gift, the final episode: Rachel Speaks for Herself
This is the eighth and final episode of “Rachel’s Gift”. Listen as Rachel finally reveals her “Gift”. Invite your friends to listen and ‘catch up’ on previous episodes. If you missed episodes go to ‘Recent Posts’ from November 28 (right hand column).
Ladies and Gentlemen, here’s Rachel:
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Rachel’s Gift, Episode Seven: Looking towards the future
“Rachel’s Gift is an 8 part series until December 23. To listen to the audio backgrounder, click: Rachel’s Gift episode 7 If you missed episodes go to ‘Recent Posts’ (right hand column), beginning November 28.
“I don’t like to look too far into the future, it’s overwhelming and you don’t really know what the future holds. If I think about the future, I start to think, ‘I can’t do it’ and stuff like that.
Right now I just have small goals. Like I am looking forward to the training to do street outreach, and start with that. I want to help people, people that are like, in my position, and do what I can to really help in the outreach program. (Rachel has joined our Urban Intervention Training and is preparing to do street outreach to people experiencing poverty and homelessness in Ottawa).
I’m praying a lot about what I am being called to. I do my devotions every day, and read my bible every day. I try to think about what God or Jesus would do and learn as much as I can. I’m a new Christian I guess, and I want to help people.
A lot of my friends ask me ‘How did you do it? How did you do it?’ and I tell them, ‘It’s Jesus and the methadone program. I say both ‘cause if you just say Jesus, they’ll say, like ‘Yah. OK. Whatever,’ and not listen. But it’s more than the methadone program. I try to help them understand the change in my life. We talk about the methadone, and then somehow they always end up asking about Jesus. It’s true. If I didn’t have Jesus, and if I didn’t have a relationship with him, I don’t think I would be clean. He just led me to the right places.
The fact that He came to the earth, died on the cross, that He died for me, that’s what it’s all about. That’s what Christmas is all about. Because of what He has done for me, the least thing I could do is to live for Him. I just keep seeing things in my life that He keeps doing for me, and prayers that have been answered. I used to be, ‘Yeah, God and all that,’ but now there’s just too much that He’s done for me, I just can’t deny it now. There’s just too much God in my life to deny it now.”
In our Final Episode: Listen as Rachel herself recounts her story about the Gift this Wednesday, Thursday and Friday at 8 and 5.
THEN, starting Wednesday, return to our website to see Rachel make a video appearance and share a brief testimony of her life. It’s a Miracle! It’s a Gift to us all! Merry Christmas!
Rachel’s Gift, Episode Four, The spiral downwards continues…
“Rachel’s Gift is an 8 part series until December 23. Go to www.chri.ca for the audio backgrounders to Rachel’s stories.
This time when I got out of jail I couldn’t go to Ottawa – I was banned from Ottawa. You know, I wasn’t supposed to be in Ottawa, but I didn’t have anywhere else to go. So, I got caught in Ottawa in a rooming house because I was taking a shower there and was arrested for a breach of probation. I went back to jail for one month and then they released me in Ottawa (laughter). I couldn’t go to my mom’s house because her husband at the time was totally against me living there. I could see why.
I got out of jail and started doing the same things that I usually do. I was staying in a heated stairwell at Nepean and Bank – it was public property so they couldn’t arrest you, just tell you to get along. When you are in drugs, people only want you at your house when you had something for them, they say, ‘I would never see you out on the street.’ But when you were in need and you didn’t have any drugs, they would say, like, ‘We can’t have people staying at our house’.
There are some places to stay when you live on the streets, but you have to be careful. Staying in a shelter was much worse – in my eyes it was like the bottom… as long as I don’t have to go to a shelter, I hadn’t hit rock bottom.
I didn’t have a place anymore, and I found a website where you could and used that to meet guys for a date… So, I stayed on the streets or maybe in hotels sometimes. I don’t know, it just became a way of life, survival.
I basically sick and tired of doing drugs, like heroin… I just couldn’t do it anymore.
I ended up in a crack house downtown: people coming and going all the time; drugs in and out like crazy, and I was still using. I had started the methadone program, but was still using street drugs. Anytime I used anything other than opiates, it screwed up my methadone and I would get even sicker.
I guess I just hit rock bottom then. Doing things I would never do and being somebody that I totally never was. People totally lost respect for me. I would overhear people talking about me, and think, ‘Is that what they really think about me?’
I just took a look around one day. I was introduced to Jesus a few years ago. When I was in jail I accepted Jesus but I was doing my own thing. Then one day, looked around and said, “Oh God, I know that this is not what you have planned for me, I just know it isn’t.”
I walked out of that place and got a place with some girls, and it was a safe place.
Next Week: The story takes a significant turn for the better. Stay connected, you don’t want to miss this!
Rachel’s Gift: Episode Two, The early years: ages 9 to 16
Rachel’s Gift is an 8 part series until December 23. To listen to the audio backgrounder from CHRI radio, click: Rachel’s Gift episode 2
“We moved a lot, especially from the time I was nine until sixteen. I counted, and we moved thirty-eight times in those seven years. Just one step ahead of eviction some of the times, mostly we got the eviction itself. It was hard to live like that.
I didn’t do well at school. Even though we moved, there always was a party at our house. And drugs. Lots of drugs. Drug dealers, users and all kinds. Cocaine, heroin and mixtures of drugs I didn’t even know.
I know I missed a lot of school, ‘cause my mom was always hung over. We moved a lot and with the partying, we never seemed to have any money. I used to always wonder why we were always broke, and didn’t really find out until later in life. The pattern was always the same: somehow scratch up the first and last month’s rent, take one month for the eviction to take place and we were on the move again.
I left school when I was sixteen, no actually before that, ‘cause I never really went to high school it was just the way it was. There was a guy that lived with us, tried to raise us or whatever – he used to beat my mom up a lot. We ended going out to Calgary, but the pattern kept with us – we were only there for three months. Life at home was pretty hard, but I made it through. Whatever.
When my mom went back to Ontario for grandma’s birthday, she met someone new and decided on the spot to marry him.
I was 15 at the time. We moved back east, and into this guy’s house. It wasn’t long before I was kicked out of the house. I can’t really remember where I stayed then, when I first got kicked out. I eventually moved back in with them – it was a disaster. There was more partying and the guy ended up cheating on my mom. The guy was charged with assault and he had to leave. More partying and then more – it got to a point where I couldn’t handle It anymore. I had a boyfriend at the time, so I moved out.”
Next Week: The first time I used Crack Cocaine, evicted again, dealing drugs and then jail.
Rachel’s Gift: Episode One, Earliest Memories
Here is the first episode of Rachel’s Gift, an 8 part series running until December 23. Here is the audio backgrounder: Rachel’s Gift episode 1
“One of my first memories was my brother falling off the balcony of one of the places we were at once, it was so dark and we moved so often. I remember sleeping on the floor of our apartment with my mom and my brother. We were using towels to cover up – I don’t think we had any blankets to use at all. There wasn’t any furniture in our home. I don’t exactly remember why. The apartment was empty. It was just us and an ashtray sitting there. Drugs were a part of my life from my earliest memories. There were parties at our apartment, and I would wake up in the middle of the night to go to the washroom and found out that the bathroom was drug central – people doing lines of coke on the back of the toilet tank. There was a lot of partying when I was a kid, it came to be just another part of my life, a part of childhood. Isn’t that what everyone does? I don’t remember my father – it was only my mom, brother and me. We moved a lot – I didn’t understand why we stayed only three months at a time in places. Now I know: first and last month’s rent, one free month and then we’re moving again.”
Next Week: Nine to Sixteen: one place after another, moving all the time, eviction after eviction, life according to drugs, trouble in school, time to move on… again.
Come as you ART – AMAZING SUCCESS
Imagine: You have lived your whole life thinking you are a ‘zero without the rim’. Violence in your ‘home’ has forced you to leave. The streets are as bad as your worst imaginations, but at least better than the mean drunk of a step father who beat you with a hockey stick.
Then: You become a part of a safe enviornment where you do art. You certainly are not an artist by any stretch of anyone’s imagination, but guess what? People you don’t even know, talk to you about how interesting your creations are, how they stir their imaginations, ask what the story is behind the art… and you are launched into a new realm of existence where suddenly, you are a person.
This is not a far stretch of the imagination! One of the kids in the show came up to me and with absolute amazement in her eyes, told me that someone bid $100 for one of her paintings. Low and behold, that person was right beside me at the time! It’s enough to change a life!
Unexpected outcomes: Relatives of the kids came and bid on the art pieces! People spoke highly of the program and congratulated the kids! People lingered and spoke with the young artists. It was a good day and a great show.
Thanks to the many who made this happen! Want to learn more? Call us!
COME AS YOU ART, Art Auction & Coffee House
We wish to invite you to our next PASSION 4 YOUTH ART AUCTION showcasing the artwork and musical talents of street-engaged youth this THURSDAY, NOVEMBER 10 from 7pm to 9pm @ Dominion-Chalmers United Church, 355 Cooper St.
Why an ART PROGRAM for STREET-ENGAGED KIDS?
Imagine growing up with no support, friends, security or encouragement. Running away from home because of domestic violence and abuse. You hit the streets with all its darkness, but it’s better than what you left.
It’s like stepping up to the batter’s plate with three strikes already against you.
Then you find there is a safe, clean, dry, welcoming space where you are able to let your creativity flow, join with other people just like you, and find freedom to do whatever you like with paint, canvas and brush.
A volunteer comes along and looks at your art, and you hear words you have never, ever heard in your entire life: “That is beautiful. Did you do that? I would love to have that in my living room. Can you tell me more about it? What inspired you?” And they listen to your story.
Can you imagine what that would be like? To have someone you just met show that kind of interest in your life? When you’ve lived your entire 19 years ‘learning’ you will never amount to anything, never get a job, finish school or make any kind of positive contribution to anyone, anywhere?
Or maybe it’s someone who wants to buy your art, not because they are doing an act of charity, but because they really like your work. They think it’s great! And you tell them.
A few words of encouragement, just those, might just be enough to turn a life around!